The Altoona Curve, who have become nationally known for their creative, fun ballpark theme nights are at it again. The club has announced a bevy of fun promotional nights, which will take place throughout the club’s Tenth Anniversary 2008 Season at Blair County Ballpark. This year, the Curve will poke fun at such topics as forgotten U.S. Presidents, fallen stars, cheaters, quitters, soap operas and “tools”, just to name a few.

 

The king of all whacky Curve theme night promotions, “Awful Night”, will return once again in 2008 to headline this genre of Curve promotion. This year’s installment of the club’s award-winning, nationally-acclaimed, and oft-duplicated promotion will be held on Monday, July 7th and will be known “Awful Night VI - Worseest Ever”. Of course, the premise of this season’s version of “Awful Night” will remain the same – tributes to all that is awful in the world, such as bad music and movie clips, awful costumes worn by ballpark staff, fail percentages and errors displayed for player statistics, awful food items and an awful fan giveaway along the lines of past items such as bubble wrap and pictures of Curve General Manager Todd Parnell’s post-surgery gall bladder. Further awful details will be announced prior to the promotion.

 

Newcomers such as “Salute to Tools Night” (April 18), “Salute to Forgotten President’s Night” (April 21), “You Got Caught Night” (June 18) and “Train Wreck Series – Ode to Fallen Stars” (August 6) will look to dethrone “Awful Night” as the gold standard for fun, zany Curve theme nights. Below is a brief summary of the many fun theme nights on the Curve’s 2008 Promotional Schedule (listed in chronological order):

 

--“As the Curve Turns” (Wednesday, April 9, 4:05 p.m. vs. Trenton): Because that day’s 4:05 p.m. start time will come on the heels of another exciting and plot-twisting day in the world of daytime Soap Operas, the Curve will celebrate this television genre throughout the game. Many over-dramatical subplots will entertain fans and on-field contests will be horribly choreographed.

--“Animal House Night” (Thursday, April 17, 6:35 p.m. vs. Erie): Not coincidentally on the same night as “College Night” at Blair County Ballpark, the Curve will pay tribute to the 30th anniversary of the hit 1978 movie Animal House with video clips from the movie and on-field re-creations of scenes from the movie.

--“Salute to Tools Night” (Friday, April 18, 6:35 p.m. vs. Erie): Double entendre will be at work as the Curve not only honor everything on your dad’s workbench from hammers and nails to screwdrivers and “T” Squares, but also will poke fun at famous people who are “tools”, described by ‘Urban Dictionary’ as “someone always trying too hard to fit in, and because of this, never will”. Former Miami Dolphins and current University of Alabama head football coach Nick Saban, who this year equated consecutive losses by his Alabama football team to Pearl Harbor and the September 11th Attacks, will be among the evening’s honorees.

--"Salute to Forgotten President’s Night” (Monday, April 21 vs. Akron): James Buchanan, Millard Fillmore, James Garfield and Martin Van Buren get their moment in the sun (or at least in the lights of Blair County Ballpark)as the Curve give a wonderful history lesson on some of the less-recognizable U.S. Presidents in history. And listen up all of you Tafts, Roosevelts, Hoovers and Harrisons… any fan who shares the same last name as any of the 43 U.S. Presidents will receive a half-price ticket to that night’s game. In a pure coincidence, the Pennsylvania Primaries will take place the following day (April 22).

--“Leip Year with Leiper Night” (Tuesday, April 29 vs. Harrisburg): In honor of the Year 2008 having 366 days and as a play on the last name of Curve manager Tim Leiper the Curve will honor all events and occurrences that happen only once every four years, such as lunar eclipses and the Olympic Games, and pay tribute to famous people from history who were born on February 29th. Also, any Curve fans born on February 29th, also known as “leaplings”, will receive a free game ticket and will throw out a ceremonial first pitch, which will be caught by “Leip”. Specific 29% ticket and merchandise discounts will also be available to fans throughout the game.

--“Bubble Gum Pop Night” (Tuesday, May 13 vs. Akron): The Curve will pay tribute to “Bubble Gum Pop” bands and singers from the 80s, 90s and today. Ballpark speakers will blare such artists as Boys to Men, N’Sync, Backstreet Boys, 98 Degrees, Britney Spears and Mandy Moore. Also, all promotions throughout the game will have a “bubble gum” theme and the Curve will hold a “Bubble Blowing Contest” on the field prior to the game.

--“Family Fight Club Day” (Monday, May 26 vs. Trenton): Admittedly much tamer than the famous movie “Fight Club”, the Curve will hold “Family Fight Club Day” at Blair County Ballpark during the club’s 12:05 p.m. Memorial Day game. Families will compete against other families in on-field contests such as sumo wrestling, kangaroo boxing, tricycle jousting and hamster ball racing.

 

--“Salute to Quitters Night – If You Can’t Beat Them, Quit” (Tuesday, June 3 vs. New Britain): Among those in the crosshairs for this self-explanatory Curve promotion will be famous quitters such as boxer Roberto “No Mas!” Duran, and coaches Bobby Knight and Bobby Petrino. In honor of coach Petrino, the Curve will also make one (1) lucky fan in attendance the winner of a “back door”, which the fan will be encouraged to utilitze to leave the ballpark before the game becomes official.

--“Name Jeff Garner’s Baby Night” (Saturday, June 7 vs. Connecticut): Curve Associate General Manager Jeff Garner and his wife, Karla, are expecting their first child this summer and want to enlist the help of Curve fans to help select the baby’s name. The Curve are hopeful that Jeff told his wife about this promotion before it was announced.

--“You Got Caught Night” (Wednesday, June 18 vs. Reading): The Curve will spend the night celebrating famous people who got caught in the act of cheating. Among the people who will be “honored” will be the 1919 Chicago Black Sox, New England Patriots head coach Bill Belichick, former U.S. President Richard M. Nixon and Olympic sprinter Marion Jones.

--“Irish Pat’s Used Car Giveaway Night” (Wednesday, July 2 vs. Binghamton): A longtime staple promotion at Blair County Ballpark, Curve Head Sports Turf Manager “Irish” Patrick Coakley will once again don a leprechaun suit, polish up his thick New England accent and make a half-dozen Curve fans the winners of “brand-new” used cars throughout the game.

--“Awful Night VI – Worseest Ever” (Monday, July 7 vs. Harrisburg): The most recognizable fun Curve promotion returns! Fans attending the game will be greeted by an awful giveaway item as they enter the ballpark, awful food specials and music throughout the game, and Curve and visiting player stats will change from batting averages to fail percentages.

--“Renew Your Wedding Vows with Pastor Parney” (Saturday, July 19 vs. Harrisburg): Curve General Manager Todd Parnell will become a ballpark minister in time for this promotion in which couples wishing to renew their wedding vows will receive free tickets to the game and participate in an on-field ceremony where they will re-confirm their vows as “Pastor Parney” officiates.

--“Please Come to Altoona Will Ferrell!” (Monday, July 21 vs. Akron): Hollywood mega-star Will Ferrell will toss out a ceremonial first pitch, broadcast an inning on radio and sign autographs for Curve fans. Actually, the odds of any of that happening are extraordinarily slim, but the Curve are hereby begging Mr. Ferrell to accept their invitation. Either way, the Curve will play video clips from his hilarious performances in “Anchorman”, “Old School” and many other films.

--“Train Wreck Series – Ode to Fallen Stars” (Wednesday, August 6 vs. Akron): The Curve will feature those in the world of entertainment who once were at the pinnacle and then hit rock bottom. Fortunately, a number have rebounded very well, but in any case Britney Spears, Leif Garrett, McKenzie Phillips, Danny Bonaduce and Jeff Conaway are among the celebrities the Curve will “honor”.

--“Hollywood Screen Name Night” (Friday, August 22 vs. New Hampshire): Throughout the game, all players and ballpark employees will be referred to only by their fictional Hollywood Screen Name, which can be determined by taking either the person’s middle name or first pet’s name and combining it with the name of the street in which they grew up on. In addition, the Curve will sprinkle the night with fun facts about actors whose names are not really what their Hollywood Name is. For example, Michael Keaton’s real name is actually “Michael Douglas”. Curve General Manager Todd Parnell, who will be known that evening as “Sparky Meadowcreek”, is particularly excited about this promotion.

In addition, the Curve have announced that they will also hold a “Salute to Procrastination Night” at some point between April 3rd and September 1st, but according to Curve General Manager Todd Parnell the club has put off a dozen meetings to discuss the specific details and still has yet to get around to scheduling the date of the promotion.